Photo by Marina Fini.

By Jenni Holtz
@queerxoh

“Over and over, I whispered my new mantra: I say who, I say when, I say how much.” – Isa Mazzei in Camgirl

_____________

Sex workers with online platforms are seeing a boom in business as of late. Quarantine has hurt sex workers who rely on in-person transactions though, steering some in the direction of (often very lucrative) online work, especially with shelter-in-place and social distancing orders. Since COVID-19 was declared a global pandemic, there has been a major increase in global internet usage and a portion of that is for webcam sites such as OnlyFans and MyFreeCams. 

As people crave comfort and companionship, they turn to sex workers, especially camgirls. Cam sites typically have a chat feature and many camgirls get to know their viewers through their regular streams. Camgirls are able to work on their own terms, often from home, and can get as creative as they want with their shows. 

Former camgirl Isa Mazzei has taken her experiences in sex work and her comparative literature degree to create content that details her time in the industry. Her work includes Cam (2018) which she wrote and produced (it streamed on Netflix), and Camgirl, a memoir released in November 2019. In Camgirl, Mazzei dives into her personal relationships with sex, her body, and her creative expression through the course of her career in sex work.

_____________

“I was glad I hadn’t had to fake my orgasm, I decided. That felt like lying. I didn’t want to lie anymore. This was a chance to build a new relationship with sex. I didn’t feel like crying, I realized. That seemed like a victory.” – Isa Mazzei in Camgirl

_____________

Sharing your body with the internet takes guts and, of course, camgirls face the same body challenges as everyone else. 

“Camming was the first place I learned that I had control over my body,” Mazzei shares. “I was able to set boundaries, and decide ‘hey, if you want to interact with me, if you want to see my body, these are my rules.’ That ability to set rules and boundaries made me feel a certain level of safety in my body that I had never really felt before.”

Before the release of her book Camgirl, Mazzei wrote Cam, a horror movie about a camgirl who has her identity stolen online. The film shares traits with Mazzei’s favorite things in horror, which she describes as “female-led, neon lighting, and Giallo-influenced.” The mash-up of horror and camming works so well because the horror genre hyper-focuses on the human body and experiences of fear. 

When Mazzei found some of her camming content on other sites, she felt the terror of losing the control over herself that camming boasted. Mazzei put a lot of thought and care into each cam show, adjusting the room setup, her outfit, props, and even being sure to note the names and bits of information about regular viewers. Having that hard work copied and pasted onto other sites was a violation of her ownership of all her hard work. 

_____________

“Sure, I had known this would happen. I knew what I put online would be there forever. But I wasn’t prepared for how violated I would feel. I wasn’t ready to see my image without my name, without any attribution to me, with thousands and thousands of views. It was like I had lost control of my body” – Isa Mazzei in Camgirl

_____________

Mazzei used her collective experiences as a working camgirl to channel the themes of her horror film and subsequent memoir. All too often, characters who have sex die first in horror movies. When asked how long she’d survive in a horror film, Mazzei said, “I like to think I would survive a while, but it really depends on who’s directing!”

In her film Cam and her book Camgirl, Isa Mazzei crafts a window into the oft-imagined but rarely seen backstage of camming. She’s no longer a camgirl, but Mazzei describes her experience camming as “a fundamentally important and transformational part of my life.” 

You can order a copy of Camgirl online here, while Mazzei’s screenplay, CAM, was made into a Netflix feature film in 2018 starring Madeline Brewer.

Remember to pay for your porn to show sex workers appreciation for their work! To help offset income loss of sex workers who are excluded from many relief efforts, check out the resources below.

Places to donate to support sex workers:

• Pace’s Sex Worker Relief Fund
• Sex Worker’s Outreach Project
• Master-list of relief funds based on location

Jenni Holtz is a film critic, illustrator and master’s student in Media and Cinema Studies. They are a staff writer at In Their Own League and Flip Screen and have contributed to FilmEra and 14East Magazine. They are currently the staff illustrator and podcast host at 14East magazine. Their passions include transgender representation, genre cinema and cooking shows.